Winning
by sneetchstar
Summary: A little bit of Team Witness fluff in honor of Orlando Jones' birthday (April 10). One-shot.


"Captain! That was most... un-charitable of you!" Ichabod blusters as Frank blows past him, having just temporarily disabled Crane's King Boo with a red shell.

"There's no room for charity in Mario Kart, Crane," Frank calmly replies, deftly maneuvering around a few bananas before taking the ramp. "Jenny!"

Jenny laughs maniacally, her blue shell not only hitting Frank, but causing him to fall off the track. "No room for charity, Old Man," she repeats.

"Says the woman in last place. Damn it, Abbie, when did you pass Crane?" Frank says.

"When you were busy gloating," she answers, hitting her item button and extending her lead with the mushroom she'd been saving. "Yes!" she exclaims, dropping her controller on her lap as she raises her hands in triumph.

"Well, at least I didn't lose," Frank says, finishing in a respectable second place. Jenny comes third, having overtaken Crane at the last moment.

They've played ten games thus far. Loser has to take a shot. The current tally is Abbie: 3, Crane: 4, Jenny: 2, and Frank: 1.

After Crane downs his shot of rum, he asks, "How is it you are so skilled at this game, Captain?"

"Macey and I played a lot after the accident," he says. There is no bitterness or sadness in his voice anymore about this subject. One thing his recent experiences have taught him is that life is to be valued, regardless of how it must be lived. Macey is alive, happy, and tops in her class. That is what is important. "She thought she could school her old man," he adds with a chuckle. "Little did she know I was the king of Pole Position back in the day."

"Pole... Pos... I assume that was a video game from your youth," Crane says.

Jenny giggles. "It does sound kinda dirty," she laughs harder. "Hey Frank, what _position_ did you have on who's _pole?_"

Frank picks up a handful of Cheetos and throws them at Jenny while Abbie playfully shoves her. "Stop..." she says, her laughter taking any sort of authority out of the remark. "Which one next?" she asks, scrolling through the tracks.

"Rainbow Road!" Jenny exclaims.

"Ugh, no, not that dreadful—" Crane groans.

"Oh, definitely Rainbow Road," Frank agrees. "I am the man at Rainbow Road."

"All righty," Abbie selects the track and adjusts her seat on the couch, bringing her feet up and curling them to the side, surreptitiously warming her toes against Crane's leg.

"Captain, why must you torture me so?" Crane asks. The race starts.

"Because I am intensely curious about what drunk Ichabod Crane looks like," Frank truthfully answers. "And I am a master at Rainbow Road."

"Oh, don't get too cocky there, Frank," Jenny says as she passes him, knocking him off the track in the process.

"Jenny, you...!" Frank exclaims, biting back whatever it was he was thinking of saying.

"Yes?" she sweetly asks, dropping bananas in her wake.

"Skilled... driver," he bites through gritted teeth, dodging the green shell Abbie has shot and running right into one of Jenny's bananas. "Damn it!"

"Curse you, you foul, loathsome, rail-less track made of nothing but heartache and... shiny rainbow... buns!" Crane curses, waiting as his car gets deposited back onto the track.

"How many times, Crane?" Abbie asks. She knows he always counts how many times he falls off the track on this one.

"Four. Thus far," he answers, pouting. "I may as well just take my shot now and have done." He sets his controller down.

"Oh no, you don't!" Frank says. "You have to finish the race because we don't want to sit here and wait for it to time out."

Crane huffs and picks up his controller. "You do all realize that the more inebriated I become, the worse I will get at this blasted game."

"Well, yeah, that's kind of the fun part," Abbie says. "If it'll make you feel better, I'll do a shot with you this time."

"I do not need your pity, Lieutenant," he answers, but Abbie knows he appreciates the offer.

"No, he needs your skills," Jenny laughs. "Such as they are. What are you in, like, eighth place?"

"Shut up," Abbie says. "Get her, Frank."

"I'm trying!" Frank says. "She's got a huge lead now... I think she's cheating."

"How the hell can I cheat?" Jenny asks. She sails across, in first place, and leans back, lacing her fingers behind her head. "I simply have skills."

Frank crosses the finish line, a distant second. "Where were your skills on Moonview Highway? Or that desert one?"

"Ugh, I hate Moonview Highway," Jenny groans. She reaches for some popcorn while they wait. Abbie finishes next, still eighth place, and Crane comes in dead last.

"I would like to choose the next race," Crane says. Abbie hands him his shot, and he sees she has poured one for herself, despite his objections. "Miss Mills..."

"No one likes to drink alone, Crane," she says, clinking her shot glass against his before downing it.

"Thank you, Lieutenant." He gives her a small smile, then drinks.

Frank gives Jenny a puzzled but meaningful look. _Is there something going on with them?_

Jenny widens her eyes and slightly lifts her hands. _Your guess is as good as mine._ "Okay, Ichy, which track would you like?"

"The one with the cows."

"Moo Moo Meadows."

Abbie and Crane speak at the same time. In fact, Abbie was already choosing the track when she spoke.

"You two... really know one another well, don't you?" Frank asks. He glances at Jenny and sees her lips twitch as she tries to hold back her grin.

"Well, it is imperative that we are..." Crane's brow furrows, "...attuned to one another... because..." he makes vague gestures with his hand, "...Witnesses..."

Frank leans forward, laughing. "Forgetful," he says. "Mister 'I have an eidetic memory' gets forgetful when he's drunk!"

"I am _not_... hey, I wasn't ready!" Crane scrambles for his controller when he sees Abbie start the race. "Blast! Stalled!"

"I told you, you have to wait until the countdown is on 'two' before hitting the gas or you'll stall," Abbie calmly says.

"Yes, I know, I know," he crossly replies. "I just..."

"Forgot?" Frank asks, still highly amused. He uses a turbo mushroom and zips past Jenny. "Eat my dust, Mills!"

"I did _not_ forget and I am _not_ drunk," Crane bites out. He drives through an item box. "Yes! The cannon... thing!"

"Bullet Bill," Jenny says.

"I believe the correct phrase to use here is 'Whatever', Miss Jenny," Crane says, sailing past everyone in black bullet form.

"Still not gonna win," Abbie quietly sings beside him.

"No, no, don't!" Crane pleads. Abbie's red shell hits him only seconds after he returns to his King Boo form. "Grace Abigail Mills!" Abbie's Yoshi zips past him while she devilishly cackles.

"Ooh, full name; someone's in trouble!" Frank says, not even caring that he's not in first place.

"Stupid gophers," Jenny grumbles, getting the distinct impression she's going to be the one drinking this time.

Abbie finishes first, with Crane a very close second. Frank is third, and Jenny, sixth.

"Well, at least your streak ended," Jenny says, lifting her shot glass in a toast to the captain.

"I didn't win the last race either. And come to think of it, I don't even care," Frank says. "I haven't laughed this hard or this much in a long time."

"That's really too bad," Jenny says. "You need to laugh more. It looks good on you."

"Amen to that," Abbie says, unfurling her legs again. "You were dead. You were evil. Now you're not. Have a laugh, Frank. No one deserves it more than you."

"Miss Mills is correct, Captain. We should take more time for levity," Crane agrees.

"Says the man with a permanent scowl," Jenny says, then quickly adds, "Not that you don't have a reason to be grumpy, of course. But it's good to see you having fun, too, Crane."

"It has been nearly a year," Crane says. Then, to everyone's surprise, he reaches for the bottle and pours himself a shot, even though he didn't earn one.

"Hit me," Abbie says, thumping her glass on the table.

"Pour me another," Jenny thrusts her glass towards him.

"Aw, hell, me, too," Frank says. "We'll all have one."

They lift their shot glasses.

"To laughter."

"To survival."

"To friendship."

"To Team Witness!"

They drink and slam their glasses down on the coffee table with four loud _thumps._

"Well, then," Frank says. "On that note, I think I should be heading home. Cynthia and Macey aren't back till tomorrow, but I would like to at least attempt a good night's sleep." He pulls out his phone and calls a cab. Knowing there would be drinking, he didn't bother driving. "Only had two shots in two hours, but no car..." he mumbles as he dials. "Crane, you need one? You're the opposite direction from me, but I can have them send two."

Crane opens his mouth to answer, but Abbie speaks before he can.

"He can crash on the couch. No biggie," she says. "It's a hide-a-bed."

"Yes, that's fine. I've slept on it before. It is quite adequate," Crane agrees.

Jenny makes a face at Frank that Abbie and Crane don't see, and Frank has to turn away to stop his laughter.

Fifteen minutes later, the cab honks its horn outside Abbie's house.

"See y'all Monday," Frank says. He shakes Crane's hand, and hugs Abbie. When he hugs Jenny, he quietly says, "I want a full report tomorrow. Text me if you have to."

"I'm still going to win this bet," Jenny says.

"Cocky," Frank returns. "Thanks for this, guys. I really needed it. Gonna have to challenge Macey again soon. If she's up for it, that is. She may be too sophisticated for this kind of thing now." He smiles at them. The cab honks again, and he grabs the doorknob. "We'll have to do this again."

"Maybe on your _next_ birthday," Jenny says, grinning broadly.

"How did you...? You know what? Never mind. I don't want to know," Frank says. "Good night."

As he walks out of the house, Abbie and Jenny begin singing "Happy Birthday to You" very loudly. Jenny holds the door open so Frank can hear it all the way to the cab.

Frank gives a wave that may or may not involve a single finger, then disappears into the cab.

"He needs to loosen up more often. He's actually kind of fun when he leaves the stick home," Jenny says, closing and locking he door.

"Stick?" Crane asks.

"Yeah, the one he normally keeps up his ass," Jenny replies. "You may be familiar w—"

"Jenny is simply saying it's good to see him relax," Abbie interrupts. "And you, too."

"Mmm," Crane simply nods, his eyes closing, as he slumps back onto the couch.

"Oh, no. You are not falling asleep until you help pull this thing out," Abbie says. Jenny bursts out laughing and grabs her phone as she walks to the kitchen with the bottle of rum.

The next morning, Jenny sends another text to Frank. _Abbie never made it to her own bed last night. I found her cuddled in Crane's arms on the sofa bed this morning. Claims she "just fell asleep"._

Frank texts back a few minutes later. _Right. You owe me $20._

_J: I knew you would win, damn your eyes._

_ F: I told you: I usually win. Because I know everything, remember?_


End file.
